My husband Brendan and I met in high school when we were both fifteen. I knew I wanted this man to be my husband before the end of grade 11, and by the time we graduated, we were inseparable. I have always wanted children, and it was my plan to start a family by the time I turned twenty-five. We were married in 2001 after dating for eight years and I assumed everything was on track. After a few years, we started getting more serious about having a family, paying attention to temperature cycles, doing research, and eventually seeking medical advice. In time we were diagnosed with primary infertility and referred to one of the largest and most successful IVF Centres in Canada.
Dealing with infertility is a hard journey and I wouldn’t wish it on any couple. The doctors we dealt with were compassionate and helpful throughout our quest to find out if there were any medical reasons for not becoming pregnant, but even so you really don't want to hear what they have to say and there isn't much to be said in response either. After each test we would hold out hope that this test would find the source of our problems and that we could then correct it. That simply wasn't the case. There were too many barriers in our way - on both sides. In the end we left with two choices. Try IVF with mitochondrial manipulation (and even this wasn't a sure bet) or call it quits. After a lot of reflection and prayer, we decided that the first wasn't an option for us. We were at the end of the medical road.
With the medical side of things decided I struggled with how to move on. For a long time I was praying and all I heard was "wait" (the lectionary series at the time about Sarai + Abram was really comforting). When we finally got a medical verdict I figured it was now time to look into other options such as adoption. The catch was that what Brendan had heard wasn't wait but rather "finish the third floor" - which we've been renovating for the last three years. It was enormously frustrating to me because I wanted to move on. I was done waiting. However, Brendan felt that we needed to finish the renovations first.
We discovered my pregnancy the day after we finished the renovations and moved up to the third floor. Needless to say the fertility specialist was surprised!
The story doesn't exactly stop there. We were given the standard advice to use birth control for a time after Elizabeth was born, but I decided that I wouldn't be able to live with the "what ifs". Still, a few more miscarriages and a few years passed. I made my peace with so-called secondary infertility, after all we had been told we were not going to be able to become pregnant at all! Then Elizabeth decided she needed a brother. Then a sister and a cousin. And finally, a January baby.
This site chronicles our journey through pregnancy into parenthood.
We hope to share some of our own struggles, joys and experiences along the road.
Elizabeth means "consecrated to God"
Eliana means "my God has answered"
Matthew means "Gift of God"
Alexander means "Defender of Man"
Amelia means "Work of the Lord"
Anne means "Grace"
Michael means "Who is like God?"
Gabriel means "God is my strength"